Wednesday, April 14, 2010

14 April 2009 Update

It's been 1 year and 1 month since Kris and Jeimi. When I was still in Ateneo, particularly the last semester I had before I got kicked out, these two were probably my best buddies. Well of course it's quite some time now - we used to hang out at Zen Garden after my English class every M-W-F or after Jeimi's Psych class every T-TH. Now that doesn't seem to be a really distant memory. It looks to me as if it just occurred yesterday or the other day. But then, I'm completely far off from that scene, at least by comparing to where I am now.

And that period in between is like one of the most awesome chapters of my mundane existence. Around a year and a month ago, I may have been in one of my happiest moments as a mortal being and ironically half a month later I got into being depressed since it seemed interesting for a kick out. Fast forward I was able to publish two unedited stories around June and December out of having nothing to do for the first one, and for the second one out of extreme rush of loneliness. As for now though, I can consider myself doing fine after so many months of thinking and thinking.

To keep this update short and before I do shut my mouth up, I realized that after all this time there were mistakes that seem to have gone by me. I couldn't call myself a complete idiot after that since I was emotionally driven to an extent in decision-making processes. I regret having committed a tad too much of stupid things too that could have saved me before my fate uttered "failure." I just want things back to normal, not necessarily what it used to be or how it should be, just any ordinary day more than a year and a month ago. And yes, I'd die for friendship. I know I'm not perfect but I'm trying to show the world that it is.

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